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5 Steps To Stop Holding Yourself Back

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You have dreams, you have pinpointed your goals and you are working everyday on the small things that will allow you to reach those goals. Congratulations!!

But, on the other side of things, sometimes you feel like not doing those tasks, or, you still do them but you also found yourself doing other small things, that don't relate whatsoever with your goals, in fact they are the complete opposite of what you should be doing.

The naked true is that you're holding yourself back! It's very important that you take this conclusion, the more you avoid and blame others or things for your own faults, you're are stepping way from success.

Recognizing our own errors it's crucial in order to correct them, and make another attempt smarter and wiser, until you're successful in what you do. We've have enlisted 5 steps for you to stop holding yourself back:

5 Steps To Stop Holding Yourself Back 

1. You're Holding Yourself Back Without Knowing

We all have patterns that unconsciously take over our lives, we follow them not knowing, and the problem is that they simply are limiting ourselves in the path to reaching our goals. Take this examples:

Situation A - You want to loose weight and be fit but you can't resist that pie at the mall cafeteria every time you pass trough it in your daily routine;
Situation B - You want to take a degree but your friends constantly invite you to go party, you can't say no, you find yourself partying more time than you are studying;
Situation C - You want to be a singer, you have a beautiful voice, but you're addicted to cigarettes, and the smoking is now affecting your voice. You simply can't stop smoking because it's in your daily routine, whenever you wake up, you eat, you go out, etc;
Situation D - You are a great professional and you want to spend more time with your kids because you know that you work more hours than you should and that's hurting your family relationship. By the contrary you simply can't stop working and your children are being left behind.

2. Identify The Patterns That Stop You

After you set your goals you need to identify the patterns, you may have, that don't contribute positively to your goal. Be really honest about it, make no drama.

Your will to reach a particular goal as to become stronger than the desire of running some specific limiting pattern.

Once you've established that on your gut you'll feel an unstoppable power. An that's what you have to chase.

The pleasure of achieving a goal has to become your driving force, not the pain of leaving an old habit left behind.

Habits and patterns come as they go, don't think they are impossible to get rid of, because in reality they aren't. But our mind makes them bigger than they are. That's why you have to be really conscious about it, you have to analyze your life and identify with precision what kind of patterns are you running that stop you from achieving your goals. 

Make a list, write them, memorize them, direct your attention to them. Don't act like they aren't there, because inevitably they are! Acknowledge them.

3. Stop Running Bad Patterns

Once you have located the limiting patterns you must do something about them. Hopefully you stop doing them once you identify them, but there are patterns that are really sticky, and you can't get rid of them easily. Even though you took aim at them they still remain in your life if you don't have a specific strategy to address them.

Be strategic about it, it all begins with goal setting and precision in locating the limiting patterns that stop you to reach your goals.

Make in your head goals more important than patterns.

After you've done that, probably bad patterns will become less important and you'll have the tendency of stop doing them with time. Of course, you still have some old habits pending, what you need to do, once again, it's to stop doing them no matter what!

4. Identify The Triggers

How patterns work? Patterns are activated by triggers, that exist in your daily life. Identify the trigger for each individual pattern you may have, and in order to block the pattern from happening you have to stop the specific trigger:

Situation A - Stop passing through the mall cafeteria because you can't resist the pie every time you look at it. The trigger is looking at the pie;
Situation B - Stop accepting invitations to go party, if that consumes the hours you should be studying. Learn to say no! Saying yes is the trigger, or even answering a call from your friends could be the trigger;
Situation C - Stop being around people that smoke, if you are a singer and want to preserve your voice. Seeing others smoking it's the trigger, or whatever moment you feel like smoking;
Situation D - Make a pause at work, stop working non stop. The rush of achieving more and more it's the trigger.

5. Replace The Triggers

For all these cases identifying and stopping the trigger are the first steps. The next step it's to replace the trigger you've found with a new one that takes you to run the pattern you want, the pattern that takes you to accomplish your goals!

Situation A - Go the other way around in your mall daily walk;
Situation B - Start saying no to your friends when they want to go party, be with them fewer times than you are studying;
Situation C - Engage in some sort of physical activity to preserve your voice and stop the rush to smoke;
Situation D - Make pauses at work and take the time to look at pictures of your kids. If they can, call them at work breaks, you'll be switching your focus to them.

In conclusion, after you've enlisted your goals you should:
- Identify the patterns, see in what way they contribute to your goals.
- If they are stopping you, identify the specific triggers that enable you to run those bad patterns. 
- Stop those triggers;
- Replace them with new better ones, that lead you to run good patterns. 
- Do them as often as you can.

If you do this reaching your goals will be easier and quicker in your life. 

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